from the nectar of my heart...

I missed a couple days of training this past weekend. From what I hear it was rather emotionally intense. Which I think is great. All the shit we try so hard to bury is being pushed up to the surface. The tide pools are filling with emotional sincerity. It's never easy to open yourself up to others. I often tell my clients that when emotions surface.... embrace it. We heal ourselves when we can honor that sacred space inside us. Our body's intelligence is amazing. Trauma that has happened years ago becomes imprinted in cellular memory and is stored within us. When it is time to let go our bodies have a way of releasing that cellular memory and give us the gift of freedom from pain.
I am sorry I missed the witness of such releases this weekend. It would have been an honor to share that with my fellow teachers in training.
I am sure I will be privy to such releases soon enough as I embark on the retreat that D'ana has in store for us. My goal at this retreat is to help facilitate others through the "unwinding and emotional surfacing". I am always so honored when I see someone have a breakthrough within themselves. Human beings carry a lot of baggage through the years. There comes a time when we have to throw out the shit we don't need anymore and make room for new experiences and all that comes with it.
I have lit a flame of unconditional love for all my fellow T.I.T's I will keep this flame burning for you  for as long as it takes for you to battle those inner demons.
Here is a little inspiration from one of my favorite writer's. I hope it's wisdom will carry you through all the great challenges life has in store for you...

 On Self Knowledge

-Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.

But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart's knowledge.

You would know in words that which you have always known in thought.

You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams.

And it is well you should.

The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea;

And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes.

But let there be no scales to weigh your unknown treasure;

And seek not the depths of your knowledge with staff or sounding line.

For self is a sea boundless and measureless.

Say not, "I have found the truth," but rather, "I have found a truth."

Say not, "I have found the path of the soul." Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path."

For the soul walks upon all paths.

The soul walks not upon a line, neither does it grow like a reed.

The soul unfolds itself like a lotus of countless petals.

Ego says, "Be your own damn Guru"!

I can't help but think too many people look to others for answers to "life's" questions. Why is it so hard for people to trust their own intuition? Are we that disconnected? Unless you "live off the grid", media has done a great job at shaping people's way of thinking. Wear this, buy that, eat only raw, drive this car, worship this god...blah-blah-blah. The list goes on....
We are all guitly of it.
I have spent many years of my own life observing this "I can't-think-for-myself" pandemic. I was ill with it for many years and occasionally I get hit with a bug of it now and then. I am personally working on a vaccine for it...FYI.

So how can I remove myself from the horrors of this media driven society and still remain grounded, connected and compassionate?

Oh wait- by realizing it of course! Awareness is the key!
So what does this sleep deprived rant have to do with my Yoga Teacher Training journey? Well for starters, yoga = union. Union within ourselves and the world around us...

I have edited this blog post so many times because I kept prattling on about what it is and is not to be Yoga. I found myself lost in paragraphs of cynicism and decided that I will not be doing myself (or anyone that reads this) any good by writing about how lost society is. I am just one fish in the sea trying to find my own truth. What I am expereincing in my life right now is a great deal of self forgiveness. Years and years of self hate and destruction. It has taken a great deal of courage to let the skeletons out of the closet. And I am just getting started...

Purity

Life of my life, I shall ever try to keep my body pure, knowing

that thy living touch is upon all my limbs.

I shall ever try to keep all untruths out from my thoughts, knowing

that thou art that truth which has kindled the light of reason in my mind.

I shall ever try to drive all evils away from my heart and keep my

love in flower, knowing that thou hast thy seat in the inmost shrine of my heart.

And it shall be my endeavour to reveal thee in my actions, knowing it

is thy power gives me strength to act.

-Rabindranath Tagore

The lotus rises through the murky waters of ponds and lakes yet, when it blooms, it floats upon the surface, its petals shining and untainted by the mud from which it emerged. In the scriptural language and sacred poetry of Hinduism and Buddhism, the lotus perfectly embodies the soul, rising up through the murkiness of worldly experience until it reaches the surface of the spiritual realm and blooms, vibrant and pure, free from all taint and attachment.